Monday, March 19, 2007

Cleaning out the fridge: Crumbs and Leftovers

As I reflect on how pitifully long it's been since I have let my fingers tapdance over a
keyboard, I feel as if I can only pull open the refrigerator door and poke and prod at foil covered mysteries. When one reviews a month and all it holds, it can have a similar effect. What's that? I didn't even remember MAKING that, yet here are the remnants to remind me. Oh, yes, that DID happen within the last month, eeww - mold is inhabiting a cute little Gladware container. So, as I am sure you are eager to do, let's clean out the fridge together.
Foil covered bowl, or, Yes, Drill Sergeant:
For slightly over a month I dated a former drill sergeant. As a matter of fact, that's only in the past tense as of today. Note: ladies, it might be a good idea to take extra long to examine the personality of an ex-military man. Only now am I wondering: hmm, experience in surveillance work, I sure hope he starts taking this better than he was earlier...It's difficult realizing that someone can have such a mix of desirable and avoidable qualities. Desirable: emotionally sensitive, loved to spend time together, good at practical servanthood and "courting", gentle with elderly people, used to be a personal trainer, good kisser. Avoidable: always overanalyzing, much more serious than I was, tendency to smother, way to quick to give me his entire heart lock, stock and barrel. Conclusion: good learning experience, appreciate how well he treated me, hope he doesn't get obsessive.
Gladware containing leftover pot roast:
NCAA season is here. I picked Florida for the Nat'l Champions, not so much because I wanted to but because I thought it the most reasonable guess. Thrilled at upset of Duke. Sad at early exit of Texas Tech. P.S. - On breaking up, had to ask for my brackets back. Ouch. Might not have been the most sensitive, but geesh - I wanted my brackets back!
Chinese takeout container shoved to the back of the shelf: Geriatric Nudity
So, as I've mentioned, a nursing home is a lot like a dorm. And like a dorm, there's a lot of nudity. Only instead of drunken nudity, it's senile nudity, which means it's not crass, but is slightly more frequent and unexpected. I inadvertantly witnessed 106 year old nudity recently. Let me just say that half of my job is being Noah's GOOD son - covering the nakedness of others who are unaware of their nakedness.
Doggie bag from expensive restaurant: grief and loss
My housemate's aunt died unexpectedly, forcing Angie and her son to travel for
a heartbreaking weekend. She is plagued with regret - her aunt was a lesbian who
died in her sleep. Moral of the story: tell the people you love - often - how much you
love them. Let them see Christ in you - often. Make sure your relationships are kept
up and tidy. Age is no guarantee that one will be alive tomorrow. Most of history attests
to that.
Zippie bag of fresh fruit: calisthenics
Before I go, a public service announcement: recently I got back into more frequent Jazzercising. Now, let me note: I thought before I began that Jazzercise was something old
people do while sitting in a wheelchair. It's actually the funnest workout I've ever participated in. That being said, I began going my regular 2-3 time weekly routine after slumping into a midwinter once a week habit. I FEEL SO MUCH BETTER. My emotions are on a (more) even keel, my stress is relieved in healthy ways, those pants will probably fit again, it ensures I TAKE TIME FOR MYSELF (ladies - are you taking time just for you?), I am revived by an estrogen-saturated atmosphere, and I know I am helping my body. Please, reach for some leftover watermelon or strawberries both in your fridge and in your life - it's such a great investment. Sesame Street said it best: Let's All Exercise. Pull on your legwarmers and give yourself a treat. Then, then, you can follow it up with half a pint of Ben and Jerry's.
Alright folks, thanks for holding the trash bag while I sort through the leftovers. Now that we're all tidy and caught up, we can focus on what is to come. Speaking of which, I need to go unload groceries. Tata for now.

3 comments:

Carrie said...

You make cleaning out the fridge sound so easy. Thanks for letting us hold the garbage bag!

FYI: Did you know that you can grow at least 3 colors of mold on corn?

Bob said...

Wouldn't it be nice to be able to predict with some exactness how much we'd eat at any given setting and that there wouldn't be any leftovers? No waste. No storage of things to be forgotten. No cleaning up after ourselves. No tri-colored molds cluttering the back shelves of our lives...but I dream.

GrandmaG said...

Love that part where you said to be sure to tell your loved ones how much you care about them,,and you don't know how long they will be here,,,how true that is,,so glad u practice what you preach. Now I must go and check my 'fridge.